full Hands, full Heart & all of my love muffins

Well we finally made it home after 10 hours each way in a car to have Thanksgiving with family. Those long hours in the car lend for many a deep thought. I have always loved Thanksgiving for many reasons but this year I especially could not get the thought out of my mind about how much thoughts and acts of gratitude help to replace those thoughts of inadequacies and feelings of being insufficient. As we drove through Flagstaff, AZ I had flashbacks of the first Thanksgiving trip we took after the triplets were born. After a three hour stop in Flagstaff to get diapers changed and the kids fed I thought we were never going to make it to our final destination. In fact we almost turned round. My girls were hungry and still only two so they needed attention. We settled on The Little America exit where my husband would take the girls to eat at the cafe while I would get the boys fed in the car. Clearly it became a joke and I needed some assistance so I loaded two of them into the stroller while carrying the other and marched into the hotel and asked if I could rent a room for an hour. The person at the front desk said no but that I could rent one of the bathrooms that they had set aside for the truckers. I think I paid $10 for an hour then set off to see my accommodations all while I shook my head thinking, "really a truckers bathroom, has life come to this?". Luckily the bathroom wasn't too bad. I then thought to myself about the fact that I had no business taking such a trip before either the babies were fed with formula or they had hit the one year mark. The whole time I remember at least one of the kids crying. Anyway I was too busy at that time to think about what life would be four years later. As we sped past that same Little America exit on Wednesday I couldn't help but reminisce about that day four years ago. Was I really that girl because certainly in my mind it just seemed like I was peeking into somebody else story. I was feeling like that would not be something I could handle today..but somehow I did it. I then thought about reasons as to why I made it during that time and feelings of gratitude flooded my heart for those who have and continue to help me. I have been blessed to know that there is a purpose of life and a God above who knows each and every single one of us...really He does.